march 24 night checkin

Posted: March 24, 2010 in ADD, diagnosis, mood chart, therapist

Current mood: frustrated – I’ve been checking out the adhd websites I was given and most of the good articles are members only. That makes sense. You’re appealing to an impulsive audience, so make something they want now cost money = membership fee. Then I remember my husband saying that I overthink things and that I so too much research about my “disorders” (and yes I do imagine air qoutes when he says it), so I just stopped.

I saw my new therapist. Can’t really say much since it was a typical intake. She did say she wouldn’t label me as borderline when I told her about my history with that. When she asked why I was seeking therapy that was hard to answer. I never know what I want out of therapy. Well that’s not true. I want them to fix me, but u can’t tell a therapist that. I don’t think she really understood my identity issues. I also don’t know about her being a christian therapist…

This whole research thing has really thrown me. If my husband is calling them “disorders” maybe they’re not real? I don’t know me, maybe he knows me better. I’m trying not to over think. But then what am I left with? Maybe I should become a full time mindless television watcher and not have any thought for muyself…

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Comments
  1. I have a couple of thoughts, Ari.
    First of all, I know how hard it is to be faced with the fact of having a disorder that wasn’t identified before. It royally sucks, but it’s liberating to know that there are strategies to treat them. Not that there’s a one-size-fits-all thing, but there’s a starting point for dealing with it once it’s been identified.
    Second, you work at a college, right? You could probably get access to a lot of literature about adhd through the library databases. And that would be peer reviewed literature, not merely anecdotal.
    Third, be careful about seeing a Christian therapist. When I was married, my wife and I started seeing a christian therapist. It fit at the time because we were christians. We left that faith, though, but kept seeing him. He helped me sort through some stuff with my parents, but more or less fostered an enmeshed relationship between me and my wife, probably because of all that “two become one” b.s. After seeing him for five years we separated and divorced. My new therapist, however, is a christian, but the language she uses is that she’s “faith sensitive,” which seems to mean that she’ll counsel people from a Christian point-of-view if that’s where they come from, but for me she doesn’t.
    Finally, I believe that psych disorders are real.
    Sorry to write a preachy comment that’s longer than the post you wrote. If it’s not helpful, just delete it.

    • arifaery says:

      Thanks for the reply. No worry about being preachy, thanks for sharing your insights. That’s kind of my concern seeing a Christian therapist. At least for me if she does start to get “the Lord is my shepherd” on me I have the freedom to leave.

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